Dear Isaac,

I miss you. Today a girl with whom I'm friendly asked me if it didn't work out between us because of sex. I asked her what she meant and she said that maybe it didn't work out because you wanted to have sex and I didn't.

Oh, how wrong that is. Well, I know you probably want to have sex (you said some things hinting strongly towards that) but you were so understanding and gentle regarding touch. You didn't want to do something unless I wanted it too. You understood that I needed to be slow, very, very slow.

For me, holding your hand was a big deal. That made it a big deal for you too. You understood that if it was a big deal for me to be holding your hand, you should appreciate that act. And you did.

How sweet of you. It makes me want to give you a hug, a kiss on your cheek and to call you, "chamud." (that means cute/sweet in Hebrew).

I only begin to understand how special you are for this (besides everything else). You're so funny because you used to remind me of this. You'd say, "You know, I'm not a typical secular guy. A typical secular guy would not necessarily be so accepting and understanding the way I am." You wanted to make sure I got it (I find that so sweet).

I get it. I'm scared I'll never again find someone who is as cool as you. Maybe I won't. Maybe I'll just end you with you, at a different time and a different place in both of our lives. A time and place when the potential can come to be.

QE